Warning: If you don't like totally inappropriate, snarky, and audacious content, UNSUBSCRlBE NOW!

Now, let the record show: I warned you!😈

But in all seriousness, if you opened this email despite the clear warning embedded in its subject line, I can already tell you're my kind of people and we're going to have a phenomenal time together. 

So, here's the thing: I respect you and your time. I'm also not a big fan of badgering, pestering, or otherwise hocking my wares at my subscribers. If I had wanted to do that, I'd have joined Mary Kay or the Church Of Scientology*.

*If you're already offended, now would be a good time to give that unsubscribe button a good spanking!

What I prefer to do is send out semi-monthly** emails when I have really cool updates, ridiculous stories, and/or piping hot tea to spill. Or, you know, when I want to tell you guys about monster d!cks, stuffing fish in my pants, and/or climbing inside of a filing cabinet just to be petty. Oh, yes, and the occasional heated author beef, like the dramatic culmination of the massive author spat I had with Annette Marie. I also might have recently gotten a roomful of people drunk and made them scream BUTT🐍COBRAS at the top of their lungs 👀

**Which actually means twice a month, unlike "bimonthly," which means every other month - weird, right??

You'll be the first to know about cool new releases and special editions, such as THE MOST BEAUTIFUL SPECIAL EDITION BOX SET YOU HAVE EVER SEEN!

I also have a BRAND NEW special edition book coming this spring that is going to make the big pink book pale in comparison. (Sounds crazy but it's true!) You can follow the project now and be the first to see the jaw-dropping cover reveal in a couple of weeks!

We looooooove pretty books over here at team RR, such as these:

"These" would be: 

• The Bone Whisperer Chronicles Special Edition Duology
• The Gilded Blood Deluxe Edition Omnibus (for which we are currently running a limited-time Scratch 'n' Dent sale, and
  
• The breathtaking REVAMPED Lightning Conjurer Complete Series Omnibus
• The revamped sprayed-edges hardcover for my neurospicy, rivals-to-lovers, cozy romantasy, Amethysts & Alchemy
• The sequel, Fire Opals & Family, comes out next Friday!

You can preorder the beautiful sprayed-edge edition here!

And that, my new friend, is about it. Feel free to reply to this email at any time if you'd like to chat. Sometimes you'll get me, sometimes you'll get a member of my incredible team, but you'll always be treated kindly and with respect. (Unless you're an insufferable asshoIe, in which case we'll take a screenshot of the convo and make fun of you with all my other non-asshoIe readers and subscribers.)

But mostly we're just here to have a good time.

Speaking of which, please make sure you add rachel@rachelrener.com and support@rachelrener.com to your address book, otherwise Google - much like the Montagues and the Capulets - will try to keep us apart. But even if this email gets erroneously funneled to spam, I want you to know my love and gratitude for you is everlasting.

Cheers and have a wonderful week ahead!❤️

Come follow me! Facebook | Instagram | TikTok | Patreon | Goodreads | Discord